You passed the test

Laughing it off, this mess,
Together, a second of calm, and then
A phone call to bring you,
My dear, to the forefront of my mind,
A "WHO IS IT?" and a qualification 
Outside of my understanding of you
In a different, private world suddenly brought
Crashing into this new one
And all at once I was thrust 
Into the forefront of the handling
Of a situation I hardly had the time to realize
Was a situation.

"Who threw themselves 
Out the window?" asked the voice,
Emotionless. 

"What?"

So "emotionless" I met the sight of a man
Roundabout my own age (close
To what yours would be now) 
On the pavement
Alive
And it was said "He
Was lucky."

Maybe not. No one thought
How he'd feel upon waking
To broken limbs and
Internment
After a mad moment comprised
Of a finality and bravery of gesture
That I would best-educated-guess
Had not been his intended 
Ending;

Or perhaps beginning?
One can only hope.

It's time to stop laughing
At the emotionlessness required
Of those in our situation,
And in his, as he only is.

It's only a moment that takes one
From this life into
The hell of the next, be it alive
Or dead.
And those who judge, or throw
Stones (or bodies) have no 
Right but the right
To a private struggle
Without the sort of judgment
We have no right to make.

"Sometimes I feel like whatever god there is
Is testing me."

"Did you pass the test?"
 
"What?" (If I had a nickel...)

"You didn't fall apart.
You didn't run.
You acted with empathy."

Whereas in my mind building a fort
Around myself was a failure.

And I realized it wasn't about me.
It was about her, and him, and them,
And I'm still here, breathing, coping.

"You passed the test."